As you may recall, the week before this one was the Week of Suspension in which my son had to deal with the consequences of joking about breaking the law, and was trapped working at home for a week. Monday morning brought his return to school.....started off with a meeting in the principals office. He did not want me there (only his dad) and so I had to hear about the results. He had written a letter to the Principal apologizing for what he had done, and explaining why his joking was inappropriate. It was sweet and beautiful, and 2 pages of more thought than ever expected. He was so relieved to get back to school! And I was so proud to have him really think through what had happened and be able to learn from the experience.
The biggest joy this week is the countdown to my Geekboy moving! In barely over 2 weeks, we will be on the road driving from the East Coast to the West Coast to finally get some living done! This has been a very long time in coming.....and a most welcome relief. Everyday he and I check the counter that ticks away the days and the hours....loving how the numbers keep getting smaller.
This is an event that has been more than a year in the making, and has held up so many other events in life. So many other pursuits. And to be on the verge of action is so exciting! It's more than exciting.....its thrilling and frightening and wonderful!
Because of this amazing thrill, nothing could have brought me down. Not my kids throwing tantrums, not work being crazy busy and sometimes out of control, not my ex stirring up drama, not being completely broke and struggling for pennies. Nothing. It all just rolled off....because it is all fleeting and insignificant in the realization that true happiness and peace in my heart are arriving.
This, however, has brought me to feel a little sad. Not for myself or my children....but for some others in my life that I see hanging on to what brings them their own sadness. There are people in my life who are so set in thinking of happiness in a certain way, that when other chances for happiness or changes for happiness present themselves, these people refuse to see it or try it. Joy and peace are part of a journey, and not a destination of themselves. You have to take chances and go through hurt to keep finding the wonderful spots along the road.
I have often remembered a quote this week. Forgive me if I get it a bit wrong, but the meaning is the same.
"Hell is doing the same things over and over, but expecting a different result."
At this point for me, the chances I have taken have given new results. The part of the journey I am on is beautiful! And I hope that it continues a while longer, and that others find their own way onto this road.
For myself....I am going to keep along this path and take it slow. I am going to savour every delicious moment with smiles, and butterfilies in my stomach, and a spring in my step. I am going to watch the calendar and the counter to the time my Geekboy is finally near me and not just on the phone with a constant giggle of delight. I am going to remember that all the other little moments of drama and tantrum are nothing more than minor bumps in the road. And I will try to keep my kiddos entertained on this journey and show others how great it is to take the chances for happiness.
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